I spent two weeks in Kampala and I didn’t fall in love. In those two weeks, I met tens of girls but none floored me. If this were a competition, I – or the girls – would have got zero percent. I then headed to Ethiopia, where, in one week, I met three girls. I fell in “love” with all the three of them, one after the other. That is 100 percent to me and the girls.
We all know that Ethiopian women are beautiful, but I have never been really that impressed. I always preferred Ugandan women because they offer variety, whereas the Ethiopians, I always thought, are beautiful in a singular way.
It turns out that I was wrong. If you look closely, like I did this time round, you realize that there are subtle differences in their beauty. I am not going to break down those subtleties, suffice to say that being a patriot, albeit not the Kyankwanzi-type, I am kind of dismayed that Ugandan women are losing it.
Before you accuse me of being mesmerized by Ethiopian women’s long, flowing hair and light complexion, let me explain that this wasn’t my first, or even second, visit to Ethiopia. I first set foot in that country way back in 1998.
This was my fifth visit, but on each occasion, the women seem to get better.
On the question of complexion and hair, I generally prefer the dark, smooth skin and kinky hair, which is why in Uganda, I tend to look more towards the east and north than the west.
The more reason I must give it up to the Ethiopian women: despite my preferences in the opposite direction, they still floored me not once, not twice, but thrice. And that in just a week. Imagine I was staying a month!
When Ugandan women don’t cut it any more, and Ethiopian women are so hot, something has to be going on. I suspect it is the economics. The richer people get, the more beautiful they become. (Have you ever seen rich parents with an ugly kid?).
So I think Ethiopia has been getting richer since I first visited it, and therefore the women sexier, while poverty is fast driving Ugandan women into ugliness. The Ethiopian economy, I hear, has been growing at a rate of more than 10 percent, compared to Uganda’s miserly 6 percent.
The construction boom in Ethiopia puts anything Uganda has ever seen to shame. No wonder then that the good Ethiopian women are getting even better. Just as well that I don’t live in Ethiopia: I would break my legs falling for those women at every turn.